


Worth It

by Hobbitlover



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-15 21:50:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18678025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hobbitlover/pseuds/Hobbitlover
Summary: ‘Would it be worth it to kiss him?’, thought Edd





	Worth It

**Author's Note:**

> I love both Jon Snow and Edd Tollett but I have never seen a fanfiction with them romactically involved...so I wrote my own! Honestly, I have always adored Edd's character and there are not nearly enough stories with him as a main character. Hopefully someone reading this might be inclined to write their own now.

Edd laid there, unmoving and slightly uncomfortable even if it was the warmest he’s been in what felt like years. A freezing cold spell, harsh even for the brothers of the wall to withstand, had swept down from the north forcing most of the brothers to bunker down and find as much warmth as they could. Aside from the bare necessities and the watch posts on the wall, most of the men stayed inside and as close to a fire or heat source as possible. In his case that included sharing a bed with the Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch, who, Edd was peeved to see, didn’t seem to find the arrangement at all uncomfortable and who slept peacefully cuddled up against Edd’s side, curly hair spread over his pillow and pouty lips slightly parted, breathing deeply and not at all concerned over the sleep, or lack thereof, of his friend.

Edd turned his head so that he was facing Jon fully, their noises only a few inches apart. It had been Jon’s idea to share his bed. He had his own chambers which were a lot warmer and nicer then where Edd slept and the bed was more comfortable and piled with furs. There was even Ghost laying on Jon’s other side which added to the warmth from the fire, furs and body heat. Edd could honestly say he had not been this warm, or better yet, had not been this cozy, for years.

Although cold spells happened quite often in at the wall, Edd never shared his bed with someone. It was just too uncomfortable for him. Joining the watch and swearing his vows at fifteen didn’t allow time for any bed sharing. However, when Jon asked if he wanted to hunker down with him, _‘to keep warm Edd, most of the brothers are having to share and I’d rather it’d be with you then someone I don’t trust as much’_ , well there really wasn’t any good reason not to.

Edd breathe deeply and snuggled further down into the warmth. It honestly was warm. Jon’s body was practically a furnace and Edd wondered, with Ghost here, if Jon even needed another body, or if Jon had done this because he knew Edd wouldn’t have paired with anyone else. Or maybe, Edd thought, Jon just took the opportunity to have another person close by, a bit of innocent intimacy in a place that hardened you and most of the people kept a wall up either to protect themselves or stop them from becoming too attached to a person as they knew the likelihood of someone dying was quite high. Either way, it worked out for Edd.

For the warmth, not about the sleeping. Edd couldn’t sleep.

Having another body, having Jon’s next to him, was, well, it was bringing thoughts into his head that his head knew damn well shouldn’t be there.

Jon with his pretty girlish mouth. Jon with his pretty girlish hair. Jon with his pale skin, strong arms, dark eyes, toned muscles, deep voice. Jon with his honour, and his sword, and his fighting and amazing ability to be good in a world that, that just wasn’t a lot of the time. Jon with rare smile, even rarer laugh, strong hands….Edd stopped breathing. One of the strong hands had just reached up and landed on his chest. Jon cuddled and moved to get closer, impossibly close. His breath and nose now tickled Edd’s neck as Jon finally stopped moving and ended up with his head on Edd’s shoulder and left arm draped over Edd’s chest.

Edd cautiously turned his head and, even though a part of himself hated himself for it, breathe deeply into the pile of raven curls now right there.

He knew of other brothers that took solace in the arms of each other, nothing personal, just to share heat or just for a few moments where they no longer felt alone. It was nothing strange, but whoever the parties were still tried to keep things discrete and everyone knew the wall was a harsh place.

He wondered if Jon was the sort. He never noticed anything. The closest Jon had was Sam and himself and Sam wouldn’t shut up about Gilly and even though he loved Jon, hero worshipped even, he wouldn’t do that to Gilly even if Jon asked him.

No. The only one Jon really seemed close to aside from Sam was him. Edd glanced down as the sleeping body now using his shoulder as a pillow. He tiled his head to get a glimpse of the pink lips still parted slightly in sleep.

Edd swallowed loudly. He had never kissed anyone before. He couldn’t recall ever really wanting to. But Jon’s lips, if there was truly lips worthy of being kissed it was Jon’s.

 _‘Would it be worth it to kiss him?’_ , thought Edd. Sure it might ruin their friendship, make being together so uncomfortable Edd might think about taking a drive headfirst off the top of the wall, Jon could scream it him, punch him, call him all sorts of digesting names, or worse…laugh at him or tell the rest of the brother. Somehow, thought Edd, even if Jon did feel disgusted or repulsed, he didn’t think Jon would want to hurt him. Let him down easy, maybe keep his distance for a bit, but eventually try to get things back to normal. That what’s Jon would do…would Edd want that? Would Edd want to go back to being as they were, could Edd even go back after knowing what felt like to press his lips to Jon? He didn’t think so.

Edd thought of all the events that he and Jon had been though, what they were to each other. ‘I couldn’t go back’ he thought sadly.

He brought his left hand out the furs, making sure not to disturb Ghost and gently ran his fingers through Jon’s hair. He froze with Jon hummed and snuggled deeper, apparently enjoying the feel of fingers through his hair.

He stopped when Jon slight lifted his head. Jon turned his head upwards and, blinking hard, muttered, “Edd?”.

Edd opened his mouth to mutter an excuse as to why he was awake and why his fingers _were still in Jon's hair!_ when Jon suddenly smiled. A sleepy, soft, happy smile of someone who was honestly happy.

Edd gulped. He tightened his finger in Job’s hair until they held tight and pulled Jon’s head upwards and he lowered his own head.

He brought his heads together until there was just of fraction of space between their lips. Edd took a breath and gently placed his lips onto those of Jon Snow. _‘Worth it'_ , he thought.


End file.
